The One with the EGD

About a year ago I started getting pains in my upper abdomen and lost some weight because I wasn't eating. I went to the doctor and basically he told me I had an eating disorder. False. I like food. I hate fasting. The pain never went away so about a month ago I went to the doctor again - different doctor - and she took some blood and tested for ulcers. Nothing. She referred me to a gastrointestinal doctor and he told me I had to get an EGD - basically they stick a tube with a tiny camera on it down your esophagus and into your stomach to see what's going on. So that's what I did this morning. We went to the hospital at about 8:30am, they stuck an IV in my arm, knocked me out and looked in my stomach. I tried so hard not to be loopy when I came to. But I guess I said some interesting things such as:
"Take my picture. I want a full-body shot. Don't gyp me."
"I wanna get outta here so we can get some MacDo (McDonald's)"
I asked what time it was at 9:26 and then again at 9:28. Both times I said, "Really?"
I asked Chris twice if he watched the procedure and if it was in that same room. Both times he said no.

I don't remember asking or saying any of that. I've decided you lose your short term memory after being anesthetized. And what did they find? A bunch of nothing. They say it must be stress. Awesome.